So the past month has been a busy one. After I dealt with the heartbreak of losing the surro pregnancy I decided that I would carry on and try another transfer. That was my original plan. I felt horrible for my IP's. I have never dealt with loss while carrying for another couple. I've dealt with my own losses and I knew how to handle that. I knew how to move on.
I had to wait for a week and a half before I could get in for the D&C. And like with everything else in this pregnancy, that didn't go as planned either. On the morning of the D&C I was rushed by a friend to the ER. Meds that I was given the night before had caused hemorrhaging. I was lucky to have JL take me when she did. They figured I had lost over a liter of blood and was very close to needing a transfusion. They quickly had me in a room and hooked up to machines. My surgery went two hours later than originally booked but I woke up from it feeling so much better. The next morning I was my old self again.
The relationship with my IP's felt a bit strained after the miscarriage. I'm not sure if either party knew what to say to the other. I've been in their position of loss before so I could relate to that, but I couldn't relate to the loss through a surrogate. Their hopes and dreams were riding on me. So, with the advice of my OB I decided to part ways with the couple. In the opinion of my Doctor, another loss was very possible and I needed to decide if that was something I wanted to risk. I decided that I would move on. IM and I had a conversation where I expressed how I felt and with no hard feelings we wished each other well. I hope all the best for them and hope that they see their dream of a child fulfilled.
Back in April when I was looking for a couple I met a A and B. I knew when I met them that they were a great couple but they were in the province of Quebec and I chose at that time to go with the local couple. Intended Mom A and I kept in touch this entire time. She's a truly wonderful person and I'm so happy to call her my friend. I had promised them that I would help to find their surrogate. I also promised that if we couldn't find one I would be their surrogate next year when I finished the journey with the local couple.
A few months sooner than planned but I am now working with A and B and I couldn't be happier for them. They have known nothing but heartache along their journey to become parents. Including when I chose another couple over them originally. A says I need to stop apologizing for that. I will one day I'm sure.
So here we go again! We started the contract portion today. Got in touch with the lawyers and will tweak my contract. Files have been sent to the Fertility Clinic in Montreal where I will need to go for the transfer. As always I will continue to update everything here as it happens.
One last thing....a big Thank You to Jessie who took my to the hospital and sat with me for hours. Thank You to Kate who hung with me in the downgraded side of the ER...you missed the cushy room....and waited while I had surgery. To my husband Mike who left work to sit next to his wife who was pregnant for someone else. Not many men would be as supportive as my husband is. Thanks babe! Lastly to my family, friends and readers who checked in on me....I appreciate all of you.
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